I held my breath around her, in fear my words will hurt her feelings. I mean, I Love her, and that meant keeping certain things to myself. At least that’s what I was taught. So, I held my words and allow them to turn into anger and resentment. I became so unhappy, not believing I had a friend in my partner.
One day she came home crying about a hard day at work. I got angry and told her “I can careless about her little work problems”. She looked at me with this face of disappointment and disgust. My heart split in half as soon as her face turned. I know, it wasn’t her but me holding in all the truth I had to express. She got up and walked out the door, I run to the door begging her to talk, but she was silent. She just walked down the street. I cowardly closed the door and didn’t follow her.
I sat on the bed feeling sorry for myself, instead of fighting for my wife’s forgiveness. I wasn’t taught to communicate in a healthy way with women. I was just taught to protect their emotions, not seeing that communicating honestly would have protected the relationship. She came back, we spoke, but the pain I caused taught me to communicate with her more effectively. I could have lost everything, believing she wasn’t strong enough to handle my truths.